


and i won't tell a soul

by LittleRouset



Category: Haikyuu!!, Kiyoyachi smut
Genre: Best Friends to Lovers, Cute gay girls are very in love, F/F, First Time, Friends to Lovers, Kiyoko Shimizu - Freeform, Kiyoko x yachi, Kiyoyachi Smut - Freeform, Life is harder than we like to admit, Loss of Virginity, SO GAY, Sexual Discovery, Yachi x Kiyoko, i cant ever get enough of writing yachi as just so, kiyoko has a boyfriend, kiyoyachi - Freeform, moonlight duh, tbh im just writing shit now, yachi doesnt like kiyokos boyfriend, yachi hitoka - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-18
Updated: 2016-10-18
Packaged: 2018-08-23 03:31:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,884
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8312335
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleRouset/pseuds/LittleRouset
Summary: In which Kiyoko reveals her boyfriend has plans, and Yachi intends to intervene in that."The way her mouth moved when she spoke was simply so entrancing as she danced over the words, that it was almost, almost difficult to miss what she had just said.“He want’s to what?” Hitoka squawked, temporarily snapped out of her Kiyoko-centered train of thought. She tried to process what the beautiful girl sitting with her knees tucked to her chin on her little twin mattress had just said."





	

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! So here is my third ever fic, and I dunno, I have been so stuck into writing Kiyoyachi?
> 
> I think this will be a two shot! First part will include most of the fluff and angst, whereas part two will embody the actual (wow, my first try?!?) smut ((and obviously more fluff bc how can’t these girls be fluffy))
> 
> Again, I'm honestly taking some personal experiences and feelings, applying them to characters, and using it to deal with life.
> 
> Per usual, I'm just a junior, queer, highschool AP lit student trying to express herself. Send help. Send bread.
> 
> so yeah heres the really queer story of first times, being unsure in sexuality, and being totally in love with your best friend. yay!
> 
> (Seriously help these dorks out)

The way her mouth moved when she spoke was simply so entrancing as she danced over soft words, that it was almost, _almost_ difficult to miss what she had just said.

“He want’s to _what_?” Hitoka squawked, temporarily snapped out of her Kiyoko-centered train of thought. She tried to process what the beautiful girl sitting with her knees tucked to her chin on her little twin mattress had just said.

God, she was so effortlessly _exquisite_. She was beautiful, and smart, and polite, and always saved her words until she meant them, and she always made Hitoka feel important. She had always been there when Hitoka needed it. Kiyoko had seen Hitoka’s best and worst. Kiyoko had been there for the brightest smiles, had been the cause of the giggly fits. Gosh, even just thinking about her for a moment sent Hitoka on a rant. Everything about her. She was graceful, clever, kind, and the way she _walked_ -

Hitoka often sat and wondered how unusual and difficult it was to think of her best friend this way. Since the start of their relationship, it hadn’t taken long for Hitoka to embrace the fact that she possessed a very, very big crush on the other girl. How could one not? She considered how ill fated she was, or if it was by chance incredibly common to fall for your best female friend. When you're also a girl. Is this the "phase" all the parents talk about? Either way, she didn't really care. Her feelings were undeniable and real, so what did that mean? Hitoka hadn’t even considered her sexuality before beginning to know Kiyoko, but now she had a feeling she could never look at boys the way she now began to notice girls. Everything was just... softer. The slopes of their necks, the curve of their hips, the smoothness of their skin. (Specifically Kiyoko's. There were very few girls who could compare. Hitoka herself couldn't even strive to.) 

She thinks that she may have been quote “blind before I met her”.

Other girls were always compared to Kiyoko in her mind now. Would Kiyoko move like that? How would Kiyoko look in that dress? What would Kiyoko’s lips look like if they were painted in red? Probably delightful. 

Spending every day basking in the light and affectionate attention of the one you’re in love with has been the most beautiful, and possibly most wretched, horrendously cruel thing Hitoka has ever faced. To feel the attention, the love, the affection; yet never able to contain it, to own it, or control it. 

It simply stood that Kiyoko encompassed a room the second she entered it. Was it really so difficult to understand how easy it was to fall in love with a girl such as her?

And it wasn’t as if everything had always been... _completely_ one sided. 

As much as Hitoka doubted herself in general life, there were moments. Times it seemed undeniable that they…

 _Had_ something. Held a connection. A tug towards each other. 

Cuddles that occasionally passed the thin line of close friendship. The way they seemed to crave one another’s physical contact, even if in the most minor ways. An arm brush. A hand held. They always stood very close together, defending their odd need for each other as being “very close friends”. There were also those certain “I love you’s” that's tones suggested past the friend zone, yet were brushed off. 

Sometimes, Hitoka swore that Kiyoko must have considered it too; even if not on the same scale. Their eyes would meet during a three in the morning conversation on Hitoka’s roof under the stars, and she simply knew. Yet she had no _fucking_ clue what she could do about it. Kiyoko was a beautiful, popular third year. Hitoka was but a small, innocent first year. She had no experience, where Kiyoko had confessions falling over one another daily. It was already shocking to her that she had been able to become this close to her. 

Plus, there was the very prominent issue that Kiyoko currently had a boyfriend of five months, also of which apparently-

“-wants to have sex with me. I know, right? I mean, I know at my age it’s not like losing my virginity is crazy or anything I just…” Kiyoko nervously bit that perfect, plump pink bottom lip of hers and aimlessly twisted a piece of dark silk (could Hitoka even acknowledge it as just ‘hair’? no.) around her index finger. Even her hands were stunning, and Hitoka, as she often did, began to think of what it would feel like to have them touch her like-

But she stopped. Kiyoko had just said something very important. Kiyoko’s boyfriend wanted to… have sex?

Hitoka couldn’t deny that yes, she knew it would happen. Hitoka knew Kiyoko liked her boyfriend, and Hitoka knew that their relationship would obviously escalate but… the thought of them actually having sex made her kind of sick. 

It was simply wasn’t fair. Had he been there with Kiyoko for as long as Hitoka had? Had he felt her shudder and shake in pain, been there to hold her close through her darkest times? Did he know Kiyoko bit her nails to shreds when she was stressed? Does he ever smile as Hitoka does, simply because Kiyoko _exists_? Did he, this _new guy_ , know not to ask about her kitten from elementary school? How truly, how fully could he know her?

Hitoka didn’t think he really did. 

Hitoka’s eyes began to water, yet she composed herself and glanced into her lap during the silence. How was it fair that he was allowed to feel the deepest parts of Kiyoko before her, without understanding Kiyoko as Hitoka did? 

Hitoka feared she would never be allowed that close. And frankly, it hurt. 

It hurt most because Hitoka knew it wasn’t an impossible desire. It was one Kiyoko was choosing to ignore. An option Kiyoko _must’ve_ known existed, yet wouldn’t implore. Was Hitoka simply not enough? 

She always felt like she wasn’t enough. 

Hitoka laughed without any feeling behind it, though inside her chest ached with the desperate need to scream about her love. “Wow, Shimizu. That’s um. A big step. What did you tell him?” She used every ounce of her strength to feign a small smile, her voice devoid of much connotative opinion. 

On the inside, she was aflame. She didn’t want to give up and turn over so easily. Wasn’t it her turn to just… _do_ something? Why was she always so scared? 

Kiyoko met her eye a moment later, releasing her lip from her teeth. She took a deep breath, shutting her eyes. "I don’t think I want to.” Kiyoko’s voice was small, nothing but a whisper. Hitoka’s attention caught, and she snapped her eyes up to study Kiyoko carefully, unsure; having been disappointed enough at this point to keep herself devoid of expectation. Kiyoko began again, looking onto the flowery pastel pink blanket that adorned the small bed. Their knees were touching, just slightly. “Well I-“ Kiyoko let out a small, disbelieving laugh. “I don’t think I want to because- Well this is hard to admit but-“ Kiyoko steeled herself, looking up at Hitoka as if for confirmation “I don’t know if I’m attracted to him enough… that way. I don’t know if I’m attracted to boys in general enough that way.” Uncharacteristically, Kiyoko began to ramble. “Jesus, I’ve been considering it so long, and I feel so close to him, but I- I don’t know, it doesn’t feel right. When he touches me it’s fine but I can’t help but feel like the hands should be smaller, softer… I just-“ Kiyoko stopped abruptly. “I don’t know if I want to end it with him, I just don’t know _what I want_ “ Kiyoko, in that moment, was so lost in thought that she barely registered Hitoka moving fluidly closer to her.

“Kiyoko.” Hitoka’s voice was steady, contrasting her typical uncertainty. Yet the fire behind her honey brown eyes was no longer dull. It was no longer unsure. She was inches away from Kiyoko, attempting to lean between her legs. Kiyoko felt her gaze search her eyes, and travel down to land on her mouth. 

The light of the midnight moon shone in through the window just above her bed, basking the two in a soft glow. They had no lamps on in the room. The only sound to be heard was the increasingly rapid beats of their heart, the shallow breaths cascading over them like a symphony. 

Kiyoko looked beautiful. Her glasses strewn aside, thin black tank top showing off the delicate slope of her neck. Kiyoko’s hair fell like satin over her collarbones. Her chest moved up and down rapidly as she leaned back in her seated position on two slender arms. Kiyoko naturally moved aside her previously tucked knee’s to open slightly, allotting Hitoka new space to lean in closer. Sleep shorts left her soft legs bare. She just looked beautiful, and so inviting. 

Suddenly Hitoka knew.

She looked into Kiyoko’s eyes, and she knew. She found Kiyoko’s eyes held the same startlingly bright fire of her own.

Hitoka took a breath and prepared herself. She leaned forward the slightest bit more, lips grazing just teasingly enough over Kiyoko’s, before she moved her mouth to rest next to Kiyoko’s ear, exhaling gently. Kiyoko shuddered, eyelashes fluttering. “Hitoka” she spoke quietly, yet it was fierce. It held want, _need_. 

Hitoka allowed herself a small, simple smile. Hitoka’s hand skimmed up her shin to rest on her knee, her lips caressing Kiyoko’s ear flirtatiously, finally _openly flirtatiously_ and she spoke. 

“I won’t tell a soul”.

With that, Hitoka leaned back, carefully pulling her pale yellow tank top and off over her head, revealing a lightly lined white bra and a soft, smooth stomach. Kiyoko had seen her undress before, yet never, _never_ in such delicious context.

As if her the boldness of her actions finally caught up to her, Hitoka blushed, moving to wrap her arms around her torso nervously. She glanced down at the space between them. “Well then, don’t just stare at me like a deer caught in headlights. I uh- kinda put myself out there just now, and.. oh god if you’re going to kick me out then- I-“ Hitoka rambled quietly, voice lowering as she began to fear the worst.

Kiyoko gulped, still in slight shock, yet she knew the time to accept her feelings for this small, beautiful girl had come. “Hitoka, stop.” Leaning forward onto her hands and knee’s, Kiyoko pulled her arms from around herself carefully, then pushed her flat onto her back, positioning herself carefully over the smaller girl. 

“You’re beautiful." Kiyoko whispered, eyes flickering over every inch of her skin in such lovely, soft light. 

Icy blue met golden brown, each enchanted by the other. It had been a lifetime coming. It had been sparks, finally given the opportunity to blaze into a flame. Kiyoko smiled softly, a finger trailing that gentle curve of collarbone she always did want to touch more… intimately. 

“Nobody has to know.”

Kiyoko bit her lip, moving lower, her breath grazing Hitoka’s skin as the small girl gasped and shivered.

“No one has to know... yet.”

**Author's Note:**

> YEAH SO THERE YOU GO IM SORRY I HAD TO DROP YOU RIGHT BEFORE THE SMUT BUT HEY IM A WUSS AND THE SMUT IS ALREADY ALMOST DONE SO IF YOU GIVE GOOD FEEDBACK I WILL BE DELIVERING THAT AS SOON AS POSSIBLE K THANKS LUV U
> 
> actually though! thank you so much for reading, please leave kudos and a comment if you enjoyed it :) ahh and please contact me with feedback (all my info is in my profile) if you would like! i love love love feedack!
> 
> thanks for wasting time im just nerd trash ilysm bye


End file.
